Life needs change.

 CONSPIRACY THEORY #20050226
eat your heart out martin luther. these are my beef(ies)
1. the sponge is for washing dishes and not the counter, the sink, the stove or
anything else, that’s what the dishcloths are for
2. squeeze out excess water from the sponge and dishcloths, else they’ll collect
bacteria and stink
3. you CAN handwash the dishcloths
4. refill the filter with more water, there’s no point in having one if you
don’t refill it for the rest of us
5. don’t put your laundry on the kitchen table, that’s tasteless and besides,
most people don’t wipe it down
6. if you’re cooking, stay in the kitchen so that the pot doesn’t overflow – and
no it’s not ok that you’ll clean it up because it’s never cleaned properly and
it still burns the next time someone uses the stove
7. if the door’s propped open and you start cooking, close it, we don’t need to
hear/smell it throughout the rest of the flat
8. a bread knife is for bread
9. food bits will clog the drain, use the sieve that’s what it’s there for
10. if you have the runs, clean up after yourself, it’s all over the toilet, it
stinks and it’s unhygienic
11. don’t let the doors slam – my door shakes and it gets really annoying if
people are going back and forth between their room and the kitchen multiple
times
12. look the front door when you leave
13. if you’re the first one up, shut up
14. don’t open other people’s mail
15. if you have overnight guests coming, please have the courtesy to let the
rest of us know
16. use headphones or keep the volume down
17. why can’t someone else get the toilet paper and garbage bags – if it looks
like it’s going to run out, go get some
18. stop stacking dishes in the dishrack – if things are dry put them away or
nothing will dry
19. please turn of hot water taps all the way
20. if you use a pot or any utensils please clean them soon after, other people
might need to use them
21. when you have a visitor in the kitchen please close the door
22. keep in mind your rooms are NOT sound-proof
23. if you turn on the radiator, turn it off when you leave the room
24. will somebody else buy dishsoap, filters etc other than maja, mina, me?
25. when you take a shower, please try to keep your hair out of the drains
26. take the trash down to the dump
27. don’t throw out the garbage from your room into the one in the kitchen
please
28. read the notices in the elevator – YOU CAN’T THROW OUT CARDBOARD ANYMORE!
29. crush any cartons etc before throwing them out
30. if you find something wrong in the flat, tell everyone else and go tell Ray
yourself

agent orange

posted by: conspiracytheorist at 16:08 | link | comments (2) |

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