CONSPIRACY THEORY #20050401

ok. call me selfish, but if the pope dies, i’m screwed. i was talking to my flatmate yesterday and he said, ‘wounldn’t it be funny if the pope died while you were in rome? err i mean bad choice of words, but think about it. the WHOLE city will be in a panic and EVERYTHING will be closed.’ JEEZY PEEZY why o why?

sabina was telling me that when her parents went to rome for the first time, their first morning there they were literally brought out of bed with people shouting ‘pope morte!’ or however you spell it. the pope passed away while they were there; their hotel was close to the vatican. at least we’re away from the city centre… but still. and of course they could do NOTHING. sheeeeeeeeeeeit!

so now everyone’s making fun of meeeeeeeeeeee. uncle spenny at the gym today told me the pope was going to die. and i said, ‘NO! he’s going to live for another 2 weeks so that i can go to rome and have a normal vacation.’ YES IT’S SELFISH!!!!! dammit. oops i mean, sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit. uncle spenny guaranteed it. and we all said, ‘oh reeeally today eh? how do you know for sure.’ and he was joking around and said, ‘i was talking to giorgio who owns a pasta shop in rome and he told me.’

awww man. why o why? now i’ll know NEVER EVER to convert to roman catholicism if my trip to rome is gets screwed up. whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? is it because of my blasphemous/atheistic jokes? is it because i always say that a church will get struck by lightening if i go to a church service and the congregation will gain a bad reputation? nooooooooooooooooooooo. yes i’m being selfish and i want the pope to live a lil longer until i come back. and he refuses to go back to the hospital… sigh. please just go. i wonder if there’s any trip cancellation insurance like that. heh heh heh… waaaaaaah!

agent orange